pb

i think i would be ten pounds less chubby if i didn't indulge in the fingerfulls of peanut butter... daily.

so maybe sometimes i have food in my car.
okay fiiiine, i always do.  i'm a mom.  if you are a mom too you are totally knowing what i'm talking about.

so the other night while jackson was in san fran for the weekend, i was driving home from a school fashion show around 11pm -ish.  i was on the freeway going south and my friend from hawaii calls me to chat.  it has been hard to talk to him since he is hours behind so he always calls me late.  i have little to no reception with my phone at my house since i live in a canyon so i pulled over to the bottom of a street next to my exit from the freeway.  it was on the side of a street next to a school and neighborhood.  i park the car and finish our conversation.  i'm wearing a skirt, t-shirt and hair messy.

conversation goes on... and i prop my left leg on the dashboard. facing my right window, slouching with effort. i find my peanut butter stash in the glove compartment (yes sometimes i eat unrefridgerated PB) and open that beautiful ridged red lid.  talking, then dipping, then talking more, then listening a lot, more finger dipping....listening....

KNOCK KNOCK!!!!
on my driver's side window!
i screamed as loud as i could.
i hate being scared.  serious.  hate it.

i see a bright round light pointed straight to my face.
i scream more.
i'm in panic mode.
i've seen too many stupid scary movies in my teenage times.
i hear yelling.
i'm frozen.  all my thoughts are, {there is a gang right outside that is going to drag me out of my car and i'm dead} but then again i do live in a safe neighborhood so no way... no you might just die....

the scary, knock-on-windows-at-night-man is yelling for me to roll down my window.
i told him no.
he yelled again and tapped my window...
the guy i'm talking to is confused but i can't move my arm to take the phone away from my ear because i'm in shock.

i look behind him and to my findings, he was a policeman.
yep... my luck.
i release my left arm from my frozeness and roll down the window with thoughts of doubt that he was a real policeman.
he still holds the flashlight in my pale face and asks me what i was doing parked on the side of the street. then he tells me not to park there because it's not a safe spot since it's close to the beach and a hill.  he then decides to say this, "do you have any illegal narcotics in your car besides the peanut butter in your right hand?"

ha ha ha! i finally broke out of my shock and started laughing.
i told him i appreciated him caring about my safety and he drove off.

the guy i'm talking to on the phone is laughing.  he heard the whole conversation and figured it all out.

i hang up the phone and look in my rear view mirror after tilting it towards me.
to my dismay, peanut butter is all over my left cheek... with chunks of peanuts.

sometimes i'm just really awesome like this.